Single Lesbians Over 40: Ditch the Bar Scene and Get on Your Computer


Looking for love

I was skeptical about online dating until my 20-something friend told me, in response to my fears, simply, “Trust me, it’s worth it". So I got online, created a profile, rewrote it, uploaded some pictures and thought, now what?

Then, as I began setting my filters to show me only single lesbians over 40 who were nonsmokers, active, and lived within a ten mile radius, I was suddenly comforted by the results. Turns out, though I swore there were no single lesbians over 40, my search results told a different story. It was a good reminder that I’m not the only single lady in a community of friends who are all married.

As I went about chatting with women I met online, it occurred to me that if nothing else, the filters allowed me to narrow the dating pool to women who were more likely to be compatible with me than a random crowd out on a Saturday night. Also, given that many of the lesbian bars have closed in my community, my friends are married or partnered, and frankly I’m too busy to go out and try to meet women, it’s a great way to do so in the safety of my home.

The beauty of searching for love online is that it assured me that I wasn’t alone in this adventure called dating, there were indeed compatible, single women out there, and I could narrow the pool in my pajamas while watching The Bachelor.

Top Dating Sites to Help you Narrow the Lesbian Dating Pool


Zoosk is a dating website that serves many communities, including the lesbian community. Two of the best features of Zoosk are the interface is ultra-intuitive, and the filters yielded a large number of matches. That said, two drawbacks are that you can’t view a woman’s profile anonymously without paying a fee, and you have to pay the subscription fee in order to read your messages. So if a potential match messages me, I am unable to read the content of her message without paying.


Match, still one of the industry leaders in membership size, offers robust features for free, including uploading your profile pictures, automatic matching, and search features. Match allows you to block profiles, which may come in handy if you stumble across an ex-girlfriend or two. One downfall of Match is that in order to see who has viewed your profile, you must pay the subscription fee. In addition, the Match interface forces you to look at your matches one at a time and select a check mark if you’re interested or an x for not interested. There is no way to advance through the matches without making a selection.

Senior People Meet

If you're 50 or over, Senior People Meet is the online dating site for you. I was skeptical about the number of matches this site would yield, and delighted to realize that there are many women looking for women who are also interested in more than the 20-something bars. There are two downfalls of this site. The filters are not intuitive, and it took me awhile to find where and how to set them. Also, I had some trouble uploading my photo, which wasn't any issue on any of the other sites.

Looking for love

In the digital age, dating applications have become part of the dating landscape. As these applications and their features evolve, one thing that doesn’t change is our desire for human connection. And perhaps this desire is the best reason of all to step into the world of online dating.

Imagine that, one Friday evening you decided to go out to a lesbian club to meet women. Would you rather go to a club where all the women were around your age, single lesbians who had similar interests or wander aimlessly around any old club? If you’re looking to date, chances are you’ll have more luck in the more specific space – with your potential matches. Online dating is the potential matches club.

To learn more about these dating sites for the lesbian community and more, check out the Top10BestDatingSites.

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