What to do After the First Date

By Top10BestDatingSites Staff

Finally, a good date that you found through an online dating site. There’s a ton of advice out there on how to act on the first date but what about after the date? Post-first date etiquette can be a real minefield, whether you’re excitedly checking your phone for an invite to date #2 or hoping to never hear from them again, try our advice for answers to the most common questions.

How long should you wait to call someone after a first date?

If you had a good time, there is nothing wrong with shooting your date a quick message within 24 hours or even on the same night. Reach out in a way that feels most comfortable for you whether it be through a text message, phone call or directly through the dating site where you met. Zoosk, for example, offers in-site messaging, allowing you the privacy or communicating without using your personal phone number. A casual message saying “thanks for a fun date,” accomplishes four things:

1. Your date will know you had a great time which may prompt him/her to ask you out on a second date.

2. It allows you to express interest in seeing them again without embarrassing yourself if they don’t feel the same way.

3. It opens the lines of future communications between the two of you.

4. A follow-up message is an easy way to put the ball in your date’s court.

A funny story makes for good dating conversations

What should you say in a first date follow-up message?

A post-date text is a good way to let your date know you had a great time – or otherwise. If you're stumped on what to say, here are a couple of good flirting tips to get you started:

  1. Refer back to something funny or crazy which happened on your date.
  2. Make a reference to something you talked about together. Ask a question or a follow up about something your date was doing or working on.

These tips will help you express that he or she made an impression on you, without sounding too eager. If you’re feeling confident that they had a great time too, there’s no harm in being upfront and telling them how much fun you had.

Should you wait the customary three days before calling someone after a first date?

The general consensus is that the old rules of dating no longer apply. Once upon a time, there were unwritten rules in the dating world. The guy should wait three days to call the girl back after a first date and the girl should simply wait for his call. Enough of that. Men are no longer expected to make the first move and they often don’t want to. Nowadays, just gauge your wait time by how well the date went.

What should you do if you don’t want to see your date again?

If you’re not interested in seeing this person again, send a polite message wishing them all the best. This will be more helpful to you both than leading them on, not answering their messages, or being insulting or rude. It will allow both of you to move on quicker and continue meeting new people online.

If you still haven’t found first date luck, consider trying additional dating sites. One of our recommended top dating sites may be right for you.

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