Whether you are thinking of trying out online dating for the first time, or returning to the dating scene after a long break, it can seem like a daunting proposition. That’s why, before you start...
Gay Ladies, Here are 5 Ways to Write A Fabulous Online Profile
By Kim Baker
15 seconds. That’s how long, according to Time magazine, that you have online readers’ interest. In the world of online dating, good profiles grab women’s attention. At a time where people are a mere swipe away from disposal, how do we convey who we are clearly and efficiently in our online profiles?
Here I offer five ways to write a fabulous, authentic, and attention holding profile.
1. Keep it about who you are.
The purpose of the narrative portion of an online dating profile is for a woman to find out who you are. The following sentences offer a glimpse into who I am: I am a feminine, athletic, professional lesbian, interested in meeting new women for adventures and connecting. I enjoy running, dining out, wine, and travel. Notice the difference in the following unfortunate profile focused on what I want in a date rather than on who I am: I am looking for a girl who is ready for commitment. No players please! I am independent and need someone who has their own life and hobbies. The reader learns virtually nothing about me. Instead, she learns only about what I don’t want in someone else. Women click on your profile to learn about you, so keep the focus there.
Keep it positive.Focus on what you like about you, about life, and about what you want. It’s easy to get caught up in what we don’t want, but it sends the message that you don’t really want to be doing this online dating thing. It’s like putting up a big wall between you and your potential dates. For example, the following sentence is positive focused: I work best with women who are open communicators, aware of their feelings, and are always evolving. Notice how this negative focused sentence says virtually the same thing, but reads totally differently. I don’t want any more negative women who can’t communicate. Please don’t be shut down and incapable of saying you’re sorry. In the short time you have to grab readers’ attention, words matter. Keep them positive and you’re more likely to attract what you do want rather than what you’re trying to avoid.
2. Keep your stuff your own.
Being authentic is all about being unabashedly you, while maintaining appropriate boundaries in for online dating. In your profile, you can be completely real without over sharing. No one needs to know about your ex, or past relationships damaged you. This example sentence offers a real view of where I’m at without over sharing. I am looking to connect with women for fun and eventually love, although I just went through a breakup and want to get to know women first. Notice the difference in the over sharing model. I just got out of a bad relationship and am not looking to jump back into anything. Not only is this example focused on what I don’t want, but it’s over sharing in the phrases “bad relationship” and “jump back”.
3. Keep it real.
Keep it all real, from your photos, to your interests, to who you are. This sounds obvious but it’s common online for little fibs here and there to turn into one big unauthentic profile. The thing about fibs is you’re going to get found out, and wouldn’t you rather attract someone who wants you just as you are? It’s good to have at least one picture that is from the past 6 months, and a variety of pictures that show you doing things you enjoy.
4. Keep it grammatically correct.
There are a lot of dumb English language and spelling rules and memorizing them doesn’t necessarily equate to being compatible with a woman. However, what you really want in your profile is for women to see who you are with as little ambiguity as possible. Misspellings and grammatical errors may not define who you are, but they are distracting and may be the differentiator between the girl of your dreams investigating your profile and leaving after 15 seconds. When it comes to your online profile, staying focused on who you are, checking your wording for a positive spin, avoiding over sharing, staying authentic, and spell checking, you’re more likely to attract women rather than distract them.
To get started on that fabulous profile of yours find a gay dating site that works for you.
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