You met on a dating site, his profile seemed appealing and you started chatting online. The several conversations you had made you smile, feel great and confident, so you asked him to meet. Getting...
How To Be A Single Gay Dad And Date
By Top10BestDatingSites Staff
So you’re ready to hit the dating scene again. Except unlike most gay singles, your situation is a little more complicated: you’re a full time dad.
You want to bridge those two parts of your life: finding love again while still being a good and present dad to your kids. So for you, it’s not as simple to just spontaneously get out there and meet other singles. No doubt you’re filled with questions about how to balance these two needs in your life - and whether it’s even possible to do that.
So before you embark on your quest to find a new partner through a dating site like Zoosk, here is some advice for gay dads dating while bringing up their kids.
Is it possible for a single gay dad to find love again? The answer is absolutely yes. Just because you have kids doesn’t mean you’re out of the dating pool and won’t find love again.
Take a look at the Latino singer Ricky Martin. He’s single, gay and a dad to twin boys. Has becoming a dad made him less desirable? Not in the slightest. Some might even argue that there’s now an added element of attraction to him. Watching him look after his two little boys, adds a caring and nurturing side to him. That gives him even greater appeal.
With that said the addition of children in your life means that they have to be a priority. That means you’re going to need a special man who is patient, mature and responsible with similar goals and values. Someone who is willing to openly share your life with you and everything that comes with it.
Be Honest About Your Life
It’s much better to be honest and upfront about your situation from the outset. Your children are an inseparable part of your life and it has a significant effect on your lifestyle. Anyone you date will need to understand that you can’t be as spontaneous as someone who is single without responsibilities. Nobody said that the first words that come out of your mouth on your first date should be "I am a full time dad", but it’s also a fact that you shouldn’t hide.
If the relationship is starting to turn into something serious and long term, then it should be clear to your date that your children will come as part of the package. It’s a non-negotiable.
Choose The Best Websites For Gay Dating
There are plenty of great websites out there that are tailored for gay dating. However, since you’re more likely to be looking for dates with a view to a long term commitment, one of the very best websites for gay dating is CompatiblePartners.
It’s specifically personalized for gay and Lesbian people wanting to find long term relationships rather than a casual fling. Therefore, you’re more likely to find a partner here who is interested in committing to a serious relationship. Someone who would also be open in taking on a parenting role with your children.
Separate Home And Love
It’s never a good idea to involve your children in your relationships until it becomes serious and you have decided to commit to one another.
If your children are introduced to your date too soon they could become attached to him. And if the relationship doesn’t seem to work out, they are going to be very hurt.
Moreover, if you are still casually dating different people, it could lead to a lot of confusion for your children.
It’s for your best interest to keep those two parts of your life separate. Get a reliable babysitter so you can meet dates and conduct your relationships away from your home and children, until you are certain you have found the one you want to have a long term relationship with.
How To Create A Balance
It’s always very exciting when you embark on a new relationship. You have that buzz, those butterflies in your stomach and can’t wait to spend as much time as you can with your new partner. However, you still have responsibilities to your children and can’t neglect them on account of your new date.
It’s a good idea to give this consideration even before you start dating. Define a schedule of when you’ll go out with your partner and the time you’ll spend solely with your children. No matter what, make time for your children. This will keep them reassured that regardless of what happens; you are their Dad who will always love and be with them.
Introducing a Your New Partner to Your Children
Once the relationship becomes serious, introduce your new partner into your children’s life slowly so you can give them time to adjust to the idea.
Start off by introducing him as a friend and go on some fun trips together as a family that your children will enjoy- this will be a great way to see the dynamics between your partner and your kids. Once your children get to know him he can gradually come over to your home more frequently. Your children will get used to having him around until eventually, your partner will become a part of the family.
As you can see, being a gay single and having children doesn’t have to be a hindrance to finding love again. So why not visit match.com now to find the new love of your life?
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