5 online dating messages all girls have received

Woman looking at computerBy Top10BestDatingSites Staff

There are literally hundreds of thousands of guys on online dating sites, and yet so many of them seem to fall at the first hurdle, making the exact same mistakes when flirting with women online, making it super likely that we will simply ignore them altogether. How many of these common terrible first messages have men sent you?

 

1. Two Word Message

“Hi gorgeous.”

This is probably the most common. It’s almost like a social media poke, where a man is simply trying to get us to look in their direction, maybe take a browse through their profile and photos to see if we’re interested in flirting with them. But with the amount of competition out there, it’s just not good enough. And to be honest men, it’s pretty lazy too. Have you looked at our profiles, or even paid any attention to anything in our photos which we spent so long choosing? There’s nothing in that message which makes us want to respond, and we don’t even feel bad about ignoring it, as it took so little effort in the first place.

2. Bad Spelling and Grammar

“Your a stunnr. Want 2 hooke ??”

This one has multiple problems. Firstly, let's ditch the SMS speak, as we’re no longer in high school, and you’re not being charged by the letter. Unless you’re trying to squeeze your message into a tweet, there really is no reason to use numbers and symbols instead of letters. It’s just confusing.

woman confused on phone

The bad spelling and grammar are another big negative for loads of women. Typos make us feel like you haven’t made the effort to even read over your message before hitting send, and bad spelling and grammar is just a bit lazy in the day and age of spellcheck. Some online dating websites even offer suggestions for correcting errors, just like a word processing program on your laptop. If you’re looking to attract a professional woman, like the singles on Elite Singles it’s worth having a friend look over your shoulder, making sure you’re not turning her off at the first message with a poorly drafted introduction.

3. All about Themselves

“I like adventure sports, I’m close to my brother, I’m looking for a job in finance, I love Mexican food… blah blah blah…”

We’re glad you want us to know some things about you. Chances are if you let us have a go at the talking I would even ask you about some of these points. But are you interested in anything other than yourself? Long paragraphs of text which don’t feature anything other than your likes and dislikes are a huge turn off. All the points which start with the word I should be your first clue that you’re headed down the wrong path. Don’t you just love it when a guy sends a message which includes questions about you, and maybe even something specific related to your profile or photos? Men, if you want to share some info about yourself, try to keep it interesting and short, like you would in face to face conversation.

4. All about the Ex

“My girlfriend recently broke up with me, I have no clue why, I thought she was The One.”

Sensitivity is great, and most women have probably nursed friends and family through break-ups with a ton of help and support. But it’s not what we want to be doing on a date, and that includes the online part. Online dating should be fun and sexy, and nothing makes flirting harder than a heartbroken guy on the other side of the screen who isn’t ready to be dating yet.

guy crying on sofa

We’re sorry she broke up with you, and we’re sure you’ll find someone really special. But not us, dude. We’re not replying to a guy on the rebound.

5. Just Plain Creepy

“Wanna come over to mine and spy on my next door neighbors with me?”

Er.. No thanks? Some guys have the weirdest idea of flirting, and have no trouble getting right to the point. Whether it’s the man who thinks it’s okay to send explicit sexting messages before even introducing himself, or the one who has a weird fetish he wants to include you in, these guys must have about a 0% success rate online dating. Fellas. Take our advice. Try not to jump right in with your crazy. Maybe start with a normal introduction where you tell us a bit about yourself, or ask us some questions about our hobbies and lifestyle, before you jump right in and ask our view on edible underwear. Just a thought.

Ready to find some of the thousands of local guys who know how to flirt online, and don’t make these kinds of rookie mistakes? Try our feature comparison for the best choices.

About Top10BestDatingSites Staff

The Top 10 Best Dating Sites staff are your guides to the world of online dating websites and services. The team navigates the world of online dating and share their findings to help readers find online dating success. Our team includes dating experts Laurel House, Ken Solin, James Preece, Erika Ettin, Nida Sea, Vanae Tran, Carmelia Ray and many more talented writers. Top 10 Best Dating Sites staff have extensive first-hand experience in: signing up for and using various online dating sites; researching the ever-growing online dating market; and copywriting and editing for various online and print publications about online dating.

 

 

Disclaimer: We work hard to offer you valuable and reliable information about all of the products and services we review. In order to provide you with this free service, we use links on our site that provide us with commissions for referring you to the seller's site. We guarantee that this does not influence the material we present, but may influence the positioning on our site, and only supports our efforts to offer you the best and most relevant information possible.

{author_box}

Dating Advice

Compare Before You Buy