Top Tips for Making the Post-First Date Call

Girl with phoneBy Top10BestDatingSites Staff

There’s a ton of great advice out there on how to act on a first date. But what happens next? Post-first date etiquette can be a real minefield, whether you’re excitedly checking your phone for an invite to date #2, or whether you’re hoping to never hear from them again. Try our advice for answers to the most common questions.

How long should you wait to call someone after a first date?

If you had a good time, there is nothing wrong with shooting your date a quick message within 24 hours or even on the same night. Feel free to go down any path that feels comfortable, whether that’s through a text message or through the online dating site where you met. A casual message which says thanks for a fun date accomplishes four things:

Your date will know you had a great time which may prompt him/her to ask you out on a second date.

It allows you to express interest in seeing them again without embarrassing yourself if they don’t feel the same way.

It opens the lines of future communications between the two of you.

A follow-up message is an easy way to put the ball in your date’s court.

A funny story makes for good dating conversations

What should you say in a first date follow-up message?

A post-date text is a good way to let your date know you had a great time – or otherwise. If you're stumped on what to say, here are a couple of good flirting tips to get you started:

  1. Refer back to something funny or crazy which happened on your date.
  2. Make a reference to something you talked about together, or ask a question or a follow up about something they were doing or working on.

These tips will help you express that he or she made an impression on you, without sounding too eager. If you’re feeling confident that they had a great time too, there’s no harm in being upfront and telling them how much fun you had.

Alternatively, if you’re not interested in seeing this person again, send a polite message wishing them all the best. This will be more helpful to you both than leading them on, not answering their messages, or being insulting or rude.

Should you wait the customary three days before calling someone after a first date?

The general consensus is that the old rules of dating no longer apply. Once upon a time, there were unwritten rules in the dating world. The guy should wait three days to call the girl back after a first date, and the girl should simply wait for his call. Hello? Aren’t we in 2016? Nowadays, just gauge your wait time by how well the date went. Plus, men are no longer expected to always make the first move, and they often don’t want to.

One of the problems with the three-day rule is that everyone already knows it. Instead of appearing laid-back by waiting three days, you just look like someone who already knows the rule. If you’re sure the two of you made a real connection, why play games by waiting three days? Try a phone call sooner and your date may be impressed by your confidence and flattered that you’re interested. If not, then you don’t have to wait 3 days to find out.

What should you do if you don’t want to see your date again?

If, after the first date, you can already tell there's no love connection, tread lightly. Your first instinct may be to avoid the person, but this isn't the best choice. If you blow off your date by ignoring them, and this person then sees you back online on the dating site again, they may be angry or hurt.

To avoid contacting him or her directly, you could use the site’s messaging system. This type of communication is far more polite than avoiding messages or ignoring your date, but is still less personal than a phone call or text message. This is a great perk of online dating, giving you this additional platform to get in touch.

Don't get too hung up on the rules of dating. Instead, give love a chance by joining one of the top dating sites and finding that special someone with the right chemistry!


About Top10BestDatingSites Staff

The Top 10 Best Dating Sites staff are your guides to the world of online dating websites and services. The team navigates the world of online dating and share their findings to help readers find online dating success. Our team includes dating experts Laurel House, Ken Solin, James Preece, Erika Ettin, Nida Sea, Vanae Tran, Carmelia Ray and many more talented writers. Top 10 Best Dating Sites staff have extensive first-hand experience in: signing up for and using various online dating sites; researching the ever-growing online dating market; and copywriting and editing for various online and print publications about online dating.



Disclaimer: We work hard to offer you valuable and reliable information about all of the products and services we review. In order to provide you with this free service, we use links on our site that provide us with commissions for referring you to the seller's site. We guarantee that this does not influence the material we present, but may influence the positioning on our site, and only supports our efforts to offer you the best and most relevant information possible.


Dating Advice

Compare Before You Buy